The inestimable Viergatch had a dream about me in which I wrote a book called “Goblin Phonemes and Irregular Orcs.” This book must come to be! But where to start? Perhaps with lentition, the process by which consonants become more “vowely.”
lentition
p > b > m > u > 0
p > ɸ > β > w > u (ɸ=ph β=bh)
p > f > v > w > u
p > f > m > ʋ > a (ʋ=vh)
t > d > n > e > 0
t > θ > ð > r > e (θ=th ð=dh)
t > s > z > r > e
t > d > n > l > o
k > g > ŋ > i > 0 (ŋ=ng)
k > ʃ > ʒ > j > i (ʃ=sh ʒ=zh)
k > x > ɣ > j > i (x=kh ɣ=gh)
k > h > ɦ > j > ʌ (ɦ=hh ʌ=y)
Taking English in that direction, we get a very Orcish: “Ngyn wei, ze e unu. Ui i niekhs i dy ry ‘eezys ‘hhofmo boz ‘vyze?” (the apostrophes represent stress)
Going in the other direction (fortition), we get a rather Goblinesque: “Kijt ‘erferdijg, tijer ler bavhtavhb. ‘Berij ‘Avhij tavh’ijdher zhuw uw ther ‘dijzert l’nijt ‘avhijterz?” (apostraphies still equal stress, and the Js make a y-sound)
Can you figure out the original English sentence?