I worked so hard on these lines.
Vivek thrust his nose in the air and affected a slushy Present Day drawl, “Some undisciplintt fewp setch me, officah! ‘Z vrath smutt lait alcohol ‘n shradu chat ma calothas prrojectah! Wet des, eh? E kaal terrain ew e shreng?”
Emily squinted. “Was he a German trying to speak Spanish with the accent of the Deep South?”
“I think it sounds more like a Chinese trying to speak Hindi with a cockney accent,” said Sam.
“He was a history student from Chicago,” said Vivek, “trying to sound like a history professor from Los Angeles.”
“And he told Vivek something about an ‘undisciplined fewb’ who touched him,” I said. “The bad guy’s breath smelled like alcohol and he tried to steal the sap’s clothes projector. ‘What is this supposed to be, a modern time train or a dirty old American puffer-belly?'”
Anybody want to try a more exact translation of what the downtimer said? Bonus points if you can figure out where “fewb,” “chat,” and “shreng” come from. 😉